To love means to grow

I come across this article of Bob Garon from the Manila Times and it's quite interesting so I post it here..

Here it goes:

HOW do you know if you are into an authentic, meaningful relationship? How sure are you that the love you have for each other is genuine and substantial rather than the smoke and mirrors that characterize so many shallow relationships?

Relationships collapse because the lovers get faked out by good feelings that are so intense that they cannot see or if they do see the negatives they cannot move out in time to avoid the painful consequences of a disastrous breakup. It is important to know the signs of real love and “perceived” love that is built on foundations of sand.

You know yours is an authentic love when you are growing as a person. Growth is defined as a “progressive advance from a lower or simpler to a higher or more complex form.”

In love, growth means that you are a better, more complete person today than you were yesterday. Your relationship is adding to the quality of your life. Not only in terms of material gain but mostly in terms you becoming a better person. If that is not happening, it is a warning signal that your relationship is not as healthy as you may think it is.

We all have a lot of potential, which lies within us just waiting to be actualized. There are powers and talents we do not know we possess until circumstances and opportunities make it possible for us to see them.

A love relationship opens to us circumstances that we are not available to us otherwise. The intimacy that love generates is something unique. An authentic relationship allows us to expand our horizons and perspectives of ourselves and the world. It makes us aware of possibilities for greater growth and allows us to pursue these possibilities. The genuine and healthy relationship lets us find and accept challenges that cause us to increase our skills, lift our self-confidence and expand our awareness of ourselves and others. In short, the authentic relationship is a never-ending adventure in growth.

Because you love your partner with a love that is giving, you make sure that there are plenty of opportunities for his or her growth. You encourage situations that are conducive to the actualization of the potential that lies still hidden within the one you love. You are not jealous nor are you envious of the personal growth of the your beloved. Neither does your loved one stand in the way of your own growth opportunities. On the contrary, you encourage each other to accept every chance to grow as a blessing.

If you are in such a relationship, then it is authentic and you are indeed fortunate. Your happiness sits on solid foundations and you should not give up your love for the world.